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warning...this is a long post but i have to rant!!

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Apr. 15th, 2009 | 11:54 am
I am feeling....: sadsad

 ok.  well....i am finally posting.  yea i realized that its been like almost 3 months since i last posted.  and that sucks.  i mean i have been doing a lot of stuff but i guess i jsut never find the time or the need to update sometimes.  but last night gave me a reason to update and to kinda vent about something that was brought to my attention.

last night im at work and eric texts me saying to let him know when i get off work.  which was weird cuz he never does that.  I mean i dont ever see the guy during the week cuz all he does is work.  i only see him on friday and sat and sometimes sunday.  and like yea at first it sucked but i have gotten used to it over the months and well we have adjusted fine. 

some background is that he works for a company called Foxxcon and its in fullerton.  and his job pretty much sucks.  hes always working hellish hours.  like going in at 930 and leaving the office at around 9 at night.  and hes not getting paid hourly hes getting paid salary.  so all those hours prettty much for nothing.  cuz hes also not getting paid too well but i mena u know as his first job he took it.  Foxxcon makes electronic equipment.....like xboxs, wii's and what not.  they ahve different plants all over the world.  and its a taiwanese based company as well.  anyways the plant in fullerton makes Apple products.  and well he is in charge of making sure the production goes smoothly.  he doesnt actually make them but he oversees that they are making the quota of products a day and waht not.  well there are two people that do his job.  him and another chick.  so they split their shifts most of the time and when shes away he has to cover for her which is why he works really hellish hours lately.  

so getting to the real point of my post.  he wants to see me after work cuz he has something to tell me.  and that was that his company is moving to dallas.  they are moving everyone from fullerton over there.  and well since he is one of two people that can do his job he needs to go over there and work and then help train other people.  cuz apparently this place is 4 times bigger then the plant here.  so he kinda knew all this was gonna happen but he was asked if he wanted to go and he said no.  well...he finds out yesterday that the other chick that does his job as well is quitting.  so that meansits just him and well hes pretty much forced to go to dallas now.  

so that leaves it with us.  he wanted to know waht i would think about the whole situation and of course i dont want him to go!!  and well he was worried with waht i would say cuz i mean.....we've done long distance before but when he came back for good i had mentioned that i dont know if i could handle that again.  it was really tough for me!  especially since it was the beginning of our relationship as well.  so he remembered me saying that i wouldnt do long distance again so he wanted to ask me how i felt and what i would do.  and well....point is...i dont want to break up with him!  i mean i love him and i just really wish he wouldnt go.  and well he told me that his intentions werent to break up with me either just because he was leaving and that he wanted to work out long distance again cuz we have already done it before.

so i decided that i would rather do long distance again rather then breaking up with him.  cuz i even asked if waht he wanted was a break then?  and he didnt want that.  he said that if we take a break then would i really be coming back to him.  and well....u never know.  i have no intentions of meeting other people or hooking up with anyone else so yea i dont want a break either.  so then he tells me that hes leaving to dallas in 3 weeks!!!  im like whoa wait....3 weeks!!  i cant believe it.  

the only good thing is that its not permanent.  he said he would be out there for a minimum of 6 months to a max of a year cuz thats waht he signed for in his contract.  so thats one thing thats making me feel better about the whole situation.  we have been a part for over a year already im sure we cna do it again.  he says he plans on visiting at least once a month hoping that his job isnt gonna give him too much of a workload.  so i can only hope that he really does come down once a month.  also i guess i cna always go visit him out there as well.  it could be a new experience.  havent been to texas. haha.  

so yea.  that leaves me with 3 weeks now with him and then who knwos when ill see him next.  waht gets me the most is that he wont be here for my birthday.....or even our anniversary!!  it will be 3 years this july 10th.  and i cant believe i wont even be able to see him on that day.  thats kinda what hurts the most.  gosh i relaly hate this situation.  after having him here for over a year i dont know how im gonna adjust.  it was always..the weekend with him.  or some form of it.  i mena i cant even jusr randomly call him and say hey lets go do this.  or on sat nights just hang out or go to the movies.  gah!!!  im really sad.  i mean...sat nights were our nights.  we had a routine,  i worked in the morning then as soon as i got out i called him and we figured out waht we should go do at night.  im not liking this one bit but hey i cant be selfish!!  thats the mean thing.  i need to be supportive cuz hes only taking this because there are NO jobs out there right now.  i mean the economy sucks and he can only hope that in  ayear from now when he comes back that there are more job opportunities out there.  i dunno.  i think my main fear is him never coming back.  he siad its only for a year but waht if they offer him something else while hes there....something that pays more and there still being no job opportunities here???  

well...i guess ive said all that i needed to say and if anyone actually read all of this then thanks!!  but yea i dont expect anyone to read it cuz its super long.  but i guess as of right now i can only spend wahtever time i ahve left and wish for the best with him.  its not gonna truly hit me until he leaves on may 6th.  gosh thats too soon!!  we'll just have to wait and see how things pan out then.  =(

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from: abbyiscool
date: Apr. 16th, 2009 11:45 pm (UTC)

OoOOH Johanna! Stay strong! I know what it's like to have a long distance relationship. Basically, the only thing I can say is TRUST HIM. Also, create some kind of daily time where you know he will call/you will call that can be a routine. It really helps. ALSO, invest in a webcam! It's not always the same thing, but just seeing each other in some way/shape/or form ALWAYS helps.

If you need anything, you know I'm here! I gotchu girrrrrl.

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